Am I a Bully?

Good Morning! Here’s the Monday Morning Blog! With celebrating the 3rd publishing anniversary of Shawn’s Way last week, we saw how Shawn navigated being a target of one who bullies. Have you ever looked at your behavior and wondered, am I a bully?

AM I  Bully image

Bullying has been around for a long time

It is sad, but bullying has been a part of growing up for a long time. In many cases, when teens have said they are the target of a bully, they are told to get tougher skin or ignore it and it will stop. I was teased by a bigger kid at the bus stop when I was in elementary school and I was shunned by my friends in my senior year in high school. It wasn’t a good feeling. And neither getting a tougher skin or ignoring it makes it stop.

All of my books, in The Way Series focus on challenges that teens face. The Hard Way focuses on peer pressure, Shawn’s Way focuses on bullying and The Street’s Way focuses on teen homelessness. Have you ever thought about whether your behavior towards someone else may have made you someone who bullies?

Am I A Bully? Quiz

In Shawn’s Way, there is a quiz which is a part of their Say No to Bullying Day presentation. It is called “Am I A Bully?” This is an excerpt from Shawn’s Way where the guest presenter, Ryan Ricter, presents the students with the quiz to get them to think about the typical behaviors of one who bullies. Take the quiz and see how you do. Are you or have you been one who bullies?

Excerpt from Shawn’s Way

“We are going to put seven different scenarios up on the screen, one at a time. I want you to take some time and honestly ask yourself, have I ever done this to someone else? After we go through all seven scenarios, then I’ll ask you the same question—are you one who bullies?”

There was some general chatter in the room before the first scenario appeared on the screen. Ryan read aloud:

You’ve teased kids, been mean to them, made fun of the way they look or speak.

After giving them a couple of moments to think about it, he moved to the next one:

You’ve spread nasty rumors about a kid at school.

After a moment, Ryan said, “Be sure to be honest with yourself when you think about these.” He read:

You’ve called kids names and have publicly humiliated them.

And the next one:

You’ve repeatedly teased kids, been mean to them, made fun of the way they look or speak.

And the next:

You’ve repeatedly kicked, shoved, punched or physically pushed another kid at school—just because!

Ryan added, “Most of you probably haven’t done that one. It’s extreme. But it does happen more often than we might realize.” Then he read the next one:

You’ve spread nasty rumors, humiliated another kid, and/or posted negative photos about them through emailing, instant messaging, texting, or created a website with negative posts about them.

“That’s the pure definition of cyberbullying,” Ryan said. “That method has been used along with face-to-face teasing to make a doubly hurtful situation for the target. And last, but not least…”

You and your friends have intentionally and for no reason kept another kid or kids from sitting at your lunch table at the school cafeteria, from playing with you, or from joining you at any group activity.

“So, how did you guys do? After seeing those scenarios, how many of you can now say you have done something to others that could make you someone who bullies?”

How did you do on the quiz?

How did you do on this quiz? Please let me know in the comments below.

I think most people could answer that they have done at least one of those things. It is ok. We just have to become more aware of the behavior and make changes to not treat people in ways that makes them feel bad about who they are. In a review I did of the book Finding Audrey, I talked about how she navigated her bullying situation and the aftermath. It can be a long road back to finding themselves and their confidence again.

Instead of treating people like this, why not try to include more people in your circle and get to know them for who they are, and not make them feel bad about it?

Are you in need of a resource to help you navigate a challenge your teen may be facing? Check out the resources tab on our sister site, Mentoring A Dream.

Have you read The Way Series yet?

The Way Series is a series of coming-of-age novels focusing on the challenges that teens face. Each book talks about a different challenge.

The Way Series Image

In The Hard Way, see how Paul Jones deals with the peer pressure of doing something he knows isn’t right. Does he make the right choice?

In Shawn’s Way, Find out what happens when Josh finds out that he no longer has a place on the varsity baseball team due to the prank that he was involved in last year.

And, in The Street’s Way, see what happens with Mikala when she runs away from abuse at home and winds up in a big city with no where to stay.

Looking for copies of these great reads? Follow this link Selma’s Books. Looking for an autographed copy? Send me a note via my contact page and we will get you one. Here is the link Contact me

Have a great week!

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